


Coconut Milk

by Harker13, Masamune7



Series: Loki... Really? [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Comics), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Aphrodisiacs, Incest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-08
Updated: 2018-10-08
Packaged: 2019-07-27 23:43:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16229747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harker13/pseuds/Harker13, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Masamune7/pseuds/Masamune7
Summary: Boys go shopping.What could possibly go wrong when Loki has a credit card? ... Stephen’s Strange credit card.





	Coconut Milk

**Author's Note:**

> Kinktober 07 Aphrodisiacs/Incest

Heroes … also have breakfast, or lunch … depends on the time they woke up. Stephen had been waiting for Thor and Loki since 7:30 am. By the time he finished his morning stretching, run and meditation triad; impatiently looked at the terrible realization that their (his) pantry was empty.

____

“It’s called doing groceries. You go to the supermarket, pick up the stuff you need and pay for them” – these guys lacked basic independency skill for being several-centuries-years-old, Stephen Strange thought.

“What you mean by -pay for them-?” – Loki yawned; too early to be arguing.

“Trade money for groceries?” – asked Stephen.

“Like gold?” – Thor really tries to put all the pieces together.

“Hmmm… more like, a debit or credit card? … how long did you guys are going to be around?” – the Sanctum was definitely NOT an Airbnb.

“Undetermined … but get back to that credit card; is it like those things people send when they go on vacations?” – Thor was really trying …

“No, that’s a post-card and no-one sends those anymore. Now just hipsters and old people collect them. That’s not the point!” – Stephen’s patience was ending – “Take it, take it! Wong; why won’t you go with them?”.

Wong was idly sitting in the couch mimicking Animojis.

“Sorry?” – pulled out his earphones, Westlife’s “Fool again” was playing loudly in his iPhone.

“Could you please join the Asgardians in their quest for groceries? We ran out of coconut milk.” – Stephen, unwillingly, adopted the motherly figure a while ago.

“Can’t! I’m busy!” – Wong put on his earphones again.

“No, you’re not!” – Stephen pulled the earphones our of Wong’s ears.

“I am; I’m meeting the Ancient One for brunch; we’re getting Benedictine Eggs!” – smiling.

“Why was I not invited?!” – offended.

“Because you are the Supreme Sorcerer; and must watch the Sanctum. Besides, you haven’t done the dishes and cleaned the guest’s bathroom.” – judgmental.

“Very well… I’m going to take this” – Loki interrupted them and took the credit card from Stephen’s hand – “let’s go find these “groceries”, brother.”

“Do Whiskey counts as “groceries”, brother?” – asked Thor.

“Of course, it does. Here it definitely does.” – Loki was sure Midgardians spent most of their lives drunk.

“God, I miss the Himalaya…” – Stephen sighed and closed the door, proceeding to scrub the hell out of that guest’s bathroom.

_____

Doors opened and a mix of air conditioning and the sound of hundreds of families arguing on which mayo they should buy, invaded the scene. Some sort of Bossa Nova/elevator music was playing in the background interrupted now and then by an unintelligible voice in the speaker announcing discounts in the charcuterie, fromagerie and boulangerie sections

“I wish I had more time to do these while I was here the first time; not fighting my ass with aliens thanks to you; could you please shift into something less … you?” – Thor asked Loki.

Loki pulled his hair into a messy bun and looked at him with disapproval.

“There, better? …”– he was wearing a baggy shirt, pajama shorts and lion slippers.

Thor brought a shopping cart - “Hop in, c’mon”.

Loki felt that oblige his brother would do no harm for once.

“We should get the coconut milk first; do coconuts have breast? … never mind; ok! by the wizard’s instructions we should only get the necessary stuff, and then pay for them. Let’s go isle by isle.” – first time Thor actually had a real plan.

“Don’t worry I have a list …” – Loki always a step ahead. – “Oysters, chocolate, pomegranates, red wine, white wine, rosé, whiskey, salmon, walnuts, almonds, strawberries, cherries, whipped cream, chocolate whipped cream, avocados, raspberries, blueberries, peaches, asparagus …”- Thor stopped him while reciting the list.

“Where’s the coconut milk?”- the least thing they could do if Stephen was paying, was indulge him.

“Don’t be silly, that was obviously a joke, coconuts don’t have breasts.” – OBVIOUSLY!

“Did Stephen give you that list?” – Thor started to doubt.

“…. sure! …” – Loki smiled.

____________

Alcoholic beverages section – First things first, so many bottles, from so many countries; Chilean, French, Spanish, Italian, Argentinian.

“Take one of each …” – Loki didn’t have time for these choosing-nonsense.

________

Fruits and vegetables section –

“Now, peaches!” – said Loki while gently squeezing a pair.

“Done!” - and he grabbed one of Loki’s cheeks.

“And pomegranates” – he looked right at his brother.

“Super done!”– grabbed the other cheek.

Loki giggled, that was pretty clever for someone like Thor. Enough peaches choosing for five minutes; it was time to get to the asparagus segment.

“How do humans pick of these?!” – said as he childishly playing with the asparagus bunch.

“If it looks like can be inserted in my ass-hole put it the cart.” – Loki wasn’t even trying to be funny.

Thor Discretely saw the opportunity and took it. Discretely, pulled out his dick and put it in the cart.

“Done! dear brother” – Thor kept shaking it for a while.

“Look at that! … With the eternal flame … YOU … are reborn, I will certainly like to taste that later.” – again, he wasn’t even trying to be funny; he just happened to be horny all the time.

“Look! a carrot … put it in your mouth; pretend it’s my dick.” – Thor brought it to Loki’s mouth.

“I would prefer something bigger…” – smirked.

“Like a cucumber?” – asked himself.

“More like an egg-plant… thick, big, egg-plant.” – said as he approached seductively to Thor and licked his neck.

_______

Sweets isle – Standing at the edge of the isle, Loki extended his arm and threw every single piece, box and package of chocolate into the shopping cart. He walked along the shelves knocking down everything that remotely smelled like cocoa.

_______

Seafood section – Those two were here solely for the oysters.

“Brother, these look sickening” – Thor almost vomit when he smelled them.

“We’re not taking them for the taste, we want them for what they cause.” – Loki carefully picked about six pounds.

“Diarrhea?!” – shocked.

“Always classy, brother … always so classy and elegant.” – unimpressed.

_______

Miscellaneous section – Thor insisted to go briefly to this isle before leaving the supermarket. Loki even had time to take a small nap sat in the floor; woke up twenty minutes later realizing Thor was not done yet.

“PICK ONE ALREADY!” – yelled impatiently.

“Almost done” – Thor took very seriously his shampoo/conditioner choices.

_______

By the time they got back it was practically dinner time.

“WIZARD, WE’RE BACK!” – yelled Thor behind a mountain of paper bags; Loki was too busy eating an ice-cream to help his brother.

Stephen flew down the starts to face them.

I HAVE CHARGE OF THREE-HUNDRED DOLLARS, YOU IDIOTS” -he started to look in the bags – “I just asked for ONE thing, TO DO the groceries while I’m stuck in here cleaning …. WHERE’S THE COCONUT MILK?! This is all sex burst shit!!!” – madly furious.

“I know that was obviously a joke because, coconuts don’t have breasts” – Loki, serious about coconut’s anatomy.

**Author's Note:**

> Coconut Milk... About 93% of its calories come from fat, including saturated fats known as medium-chain triglycerides (MCTs).  
> The milk is also a good source of several vitamins and minerals. ...
> 
> ;D


End file.
